Being a mommy is hard. Following all the advice a mommy gets is even harder. From how to sleep train to whether or not to nag about nose picking, it seems there’s no shortage of opinions on every aspect of child rearing.
So we pick and we choose. We take some advice as non-negotiable truth, ignore other tidbits full stop, and the rest, well, that’s the advice we know is great, even advisable. But it’s not always reality. Life – whether it’s timing, fatigue or that unidentifiable sticky stuff underneath the table – just seems to get in the way. So we twist, mold and make it our own. Which is just fine as long as we end up doing what we think is best…or what’s okay-ish just to survive the moment (or the entire 3rd year)!
What they say: Relax. As soon as you stop worrying about getting pregnant, you will!
What we do: Stress more, sleep less. Wait, did I just ovulate?! [Insert panic attack.]
What they say: When pregnant, you only need about 300 extra calories each day – about the equivalent of a small apple and handful of almonds.
What we do: The baby wants donuts. And stuffed manicotti. For a snack.
What they say: Cut back – or better yet – skip caffeine altogether during pregnancy.
What we do: I have no idea. I haven’t had caffeine in 24 hours. I DON’T KNOW MY OWN NAME.
What they say: Sleep when the baby sleeps.
What we do: Laugh maniacally while doing a load of laundry in the shower, throwing the dishes in the dryer and trying to brush my teeth for the first time in 3 days.
What they say: Even before the first tooth comes in, get in the habit of wiping your baby’s gums with a soft wet washcloth. Start regular tooth brushing when teeth appear.
What we do: Umm…
What they say: Make food fun by using cookie cutters to create enticing shapes out of veggies, cheese and bread. Always offer a variety of colors at every meal.
What we do: Peanut butter and jelly. Cut in squares. No, you don’t want squares. Here, I’ll tape it back together and then pretend I’m not about to lose my mind because now you want buttered noodles. Cut in squares. Gah!
What they say: Avoid snacks within two hours of dinner, but if you must offer something, offer fresh veggies.
What we do: Offer carrots, bell peppers, broccoli and ranch dip. Watch as veggies slowly dry up and die a slow veggie death with each whined, “No! No want veg! Crackers! CRACKERS!”
What they say: No matter how embarrassed you are, don’t nag or punish your child for nose picking.
What we do: Gently swat away her hand, tell her our fingers don’t belong there and then nervously laugh as we mentally note just how many people saw her little booger snack.
What they say: Make one meal for the entire family. Same food, same time, same table.
What we do: Make one meal for the entire family. Lure 3-year old to sit at table. Encourage 3-year old to take a bite. Bribe 3-year old to take a bite. Chase 3-year old around living room. Threaten 3-year old with removal of Matchbox cars. Chase 3-year old around living room. Beg 3-year old to take one bite. Chase 3-year old around living room. Break out goldfish.
What they say: When your preschooler appears at your bedside in the middle of the night, calmly and quietly lead him back to his room, explaining that your room is for parents only.
What we do: It’s 3am. Why are you here?! No. No, no, no, no. I’m not getting up. I should get up. I’m not. I should. Fine, climb in. But only for tonight! [Repeat]
What they say: Consistent wake-up times and routines are just as important as consistent bed times.
What we do: They’re sleeping in? Are you sure? They’re sleeping in! Don’t move. Don’t. Make. A. Noise.
What they say: Hug and kiss them every chance you get because time goes so fast.
What we do: Hug and kiss them every chance you get because time goes so, so, so very fast.
