As we embark on this busy holiday season full of cheer and travel let this be a reminder to those who take advantage of designated family areas causing undue stress and anxiety to parents in airports across the country. We MUST take a stand.
Dear Business Man Who Poops in the Family Restroom at the Airport:
This bathroom is not a quiet reprieve for you to sit on the toilet and break out your iPad for a little catching up on the latest headlines. THAT IS WHY THERE IS A MEN’S RESTROOM RIGHT NEXT TO THE FAMILY RESTROOM for you, traveling ALONE. I have three children, some of which are threatening to pee their pants if we don’t use the bathroom (right this second!) before we board. Have you ever had to get your young son to hit the mark when the plane is bouncing around due to turbulence? Or tried to change a diaper in an airplane bathroom? (That’s like trying to be a contortionist in a box while trying not to smear feces on your holiday sweater!) So the fastest and safest way for us to achieve a record-breaking potty stop is the use of the family restroom provided to US for exactly that reason.
So when I see the door open and you are ALONE with your business satchel and a sheepish half smile stepping out of the FAMILY RESTROOM I want to deck you. No really, I do because now I have to take MY family of five into that very small, stinky space that you just used with no regard for us families who need to use this bathroom. (Maybe next time pack a little spray!)
We nearly missed our flight because of you as we frantically checked for diaper changers in both of the men’s & women’s restrooms while waiting for you to “drop the kids off at the pool.” And now I have to explain to my 4-year-old why it smells so bad in the bathroom and why I am so angry. And I try to describe to him in the most polite way why I HATE YOU at that moment. And believe me, I wanted to call you all sorts of names but instead I used words like inconsiderate, hurried, (or jackass. I can’t remember really.) and someone who felt that their time and privacy was more important than that of mine, my husband’s and my three children. All while clinching my teeth from aggravation and trying not to take deep breaths because of the stench you made.
So next time your tummy starts rumbling because of the micro brewed beer and airport BBQ sandwich you just shoved down your throat and you are looking for the nearest ‘loo, just remember there are moms out there just like me who truly need to use the FAMILY RESTROOM. So grab your newspaper (and don’t forget the spray!) and march yourself right on into the MEN’S RESTROOM to do your business next time okay?
Sincerely,
The Mom in the Airport who gave you the
Mom glare that you probably haven’t seen since
YOUR mom did the same to you.
And if you happen to encounter someone inconsiderately using the family restroom this holiday season, remember to give them your best mom glare! I know you’ve got it in you. Happy holidays!
23 comments
I am a breastfeeding mom and travel often for business. Many airports the only bathrooms that offer a plug are the family bathrooms. I felt so horrible last time pumping in the family bathroom and hearing outside a little girl with her dad yelling “I have to poooooop daddy”. I have no other easy options when traveling and got a nasty comment as I was leaving. It really hurt me to hear that nasty comment directed towards me. So yes to the pooping alone man don’t use the family bathroom, but keep in mind an alone pumping female could come out and has a very good reason!!
Me too! I always felt SO horrible pumping in the family bathroom while a family waits outside, but at airports where they didn’t have mother’s rooms, there was often no other choice.
Although I understand the frustration and have been there myself with my son who has ASD I also must stick up for myself, as I have been that sole person in the family restroom. This is because I have Crohn’s. I sometimes have to go very urgently, and it’s usually not very pleasant. However in a place like a busy airport I have had to stand in line so long that I have had to change. I know what you are thinking…ask the people in line, try to explain. Let me tell you, the majority don’t care why you need a stall right now. This is a problem at events, stadiums, airports ect. There are states that are trying to pass legislation to issue “can’t wait” cards to ensure people like me can use any bathroom even if it’s marked employees only. Perhaps you are judging this man without knowing his situations, and trust me it’s embarrassing to try to explain why you can’t wait, people judge you further, I’ve even been called a liar. Maybe if I someday get that card I can whip it out for those that are judging me.
I get that’s a inconvenience having to wait, but are you sure he actually the bathroom? Some people have medical issues that aren’t visible, like incontinence, or a stoma etc, that would require more space and privacy to deal with than a normal bathroom stall would provide.
Did you ever consider that he may be incontinent himself? Changing yourself (be it a pullup or a diaper-type product) in a restroom stall is a huge pain, and then you have to work out a way to carry it out to the trash can. There are no trash cans in men’s restroom stalls, and sometimes I’ve leaked diarrhea around the legs a bit and I really don’t want to hide it under my shirt or in my coat. I try to carry gallon ziplock bags with me, but sometimes I run out of things like that.
I have a toddler; I know how it is trying to change them in a public restroom; in particular a men’s restroom…I am amazed how many new places I visit don’t have a changing table in the men’s restroom, but do in the women’s. Even places like family restaurants or a local place that has a left-wing focus that you would think would be way-into equality…nope, I have to change my two-year-old daughter in the stall or standing up in the room. If my wife is with me, I have to make her do the bathroom duties in those places.
So I value the family restrooms for that, but it doesn’t give me special rights.
Given all your complaints about odor, it’s also quite possible that the man has an ostomy, and may have had a problem with his appliance coming loose or leaking after being scrunched up on the plane. This is a common problem. It’s a whole lot easier to deal with changing your appliance in a restroom with running water and paper towels then hiding in shame in a stall with a baggie of wet wipes.
His “business satchel” could have been to contain his ostomy supplies (bag, scissors, spare wafers, etc) or adult diapers.
I’ve come out of a single-user bathroom alone and faced the angry glare of some mom with her kid before–sometimes an older boy who could surely go in to the men’s by themselves now–and I’ve thought “you know, I needed this a whole lot more than you did”, as I had traveled across some store desperate to make it before I had an accident…or if I did, before it leaked out onto my clothing. Try dealing with the worry that at any moment you could have an fecal accident…it’s like having a bad stomach flu. I’ve been dealing with it for 25 years, starting in college. My medication runs $60K per year; I’ve had to sacrifice a better career for better insurance. I don’t need some self-important young mom putting me down. I’ve been back in diapers since before she got out of them.
No matter if the intent is humor or not, this is a real put-down to men and people with medical problems. Like “Jennifer” above to argues that it is okay for a WOMAN to use it alone because she might be breast-pumping, but not a man. A man with an ostomy or a diarrhea-filled diaper has a lot better excuse to use that room than you do. Nobody knows I am sick to look at me; that’s due to a WHOLE LOT of hard work on my part and a lot of money from my insurance provider.
Sadly there’s lots of people out there that just don’t get it. family restrooms are there for more than just “family”. I myself use them when available and I’ve had a few of those looks sent my way because they see a capable girl in her 20s walking out of the “family” restroom and think I’ve been putting on makeup and plucking my eyebrows. News flash, changing a diaper in a normal stall is not easy, and it’s rveh harder when it’s your own. At least your kid gets a changing table. I wish I didn’t have to change mine from the floor.
Well, as a mom of twin girls I have been thankful for the family bathroom. Also as a person with disabilities (that are not always noticeable) the bathroom is marked “Family Bathroom” with a handicap placard below it. So it is for both.
As a transgender person, the family restroom is the only one I’m legally allowed to use.
It’s not all about you, someone who I now imagine hogs an entire store aisle and gives the “mom glare” to anyone who dares to want peanut butter while you’re there with your precious brood.
It’s not all about you and your family, lady.
I’d like to echo what Chris said. I was just belittled today by a man, his WiFi and two daughters upon exiting the companion restroom. I had just changed my diaper and he started yelling at me accusing me of not being disabled and in no need of the private restroom. Disabilities aren’t always visible and this was completely uncalled for. I actually told him what I was doing and he looked a bit taken back. People please be kind. Changing a diaper in a tiny airport stall is so incredibly difficult and embarrassing. Please don’t add insult to injury