“Meet my friend,” they said.
“He’s a wonderful person to be around,” they said.
“However…he does have a baby and was never married,” they said.
Scary thoughts, right? These are the first words that I heard before I met my now husband.
Dating a man with a child had its ups and downs. There were weekends where it was just us “dating” and other weekends where I had to help him with his child. But I got to see a side of him that many single people don’t always get to see, and that was him being a dad.
I always envisioned myself as getting married someday and having children with my husband. I never envisioned myself becoming a stepmom. NEVER. I never woke up and said to myself that I wanted to become a stepmom.
However, seeing my husband with his child, made me want to be a part of his family. I saw the way he interacted with his daughter. I saw the way he smiled when his daughter smiled. I loved how much he made his daughter happy by playing dolls with her and dressing them up in cute, little doll outfits. I loved their connection and watching them both grow together. I loved how he was as a dad. And that made me love him even more.
I also started to create a bond with his daughter, while I was dating him. I would get to help cook for his daughter and feed her. I would read her favorite books to her. I would sing songs and dance with her. I would take her on walks to the park and play on the playground with her. I made his daughter a pink, fleece blanket and that became her favorite blanket to carry around the house. His daughter and I made a bonding connection and I saw how much that made them both happy.
He appreciated me when I helped him out with his daughter. He thanked me daily. He knew I was also an asset to his little family and that made me feel good. It made me feel as though I was doing something right.
Many people who are dating don’t get to do a test run to see how their spouse will be as a parent before they marry them. I got to know how he was a dad, before I married him. So when he asked me to marry him, I knew my answer immediately. I knew I wanted to become a part of his family. I knew I wanted to be a part of his daughter’s life. I knew I wanted to be a wife and a stepmom. And that was because of how he was as a person.
And that’s why my husband is the reason why I became a stepmom.