What does it mean to lose your baby? What happens to me when I lose my baby? So many things. It means my world changes, it means my heart is broken and missing and gone.
Two friends explore what their experiences have brought them. Alison, who lost sweet Leo when he was just 2 months and 22 days, walking the loss of a child and baby loss after birth, and me – I’ve lost four babies in pregnancy, walking stillbirth and baby loss before birth.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month. October 15th is the specific awareness date. Tonight, we will both light a candle for you. For your babies. For your pain. For your heart. For the love you have to give but don’t know where to put. Your people that are missing counted. We are your sisters. And we will not leave you alone.
We are two friends, who want more than anything for you to know, you are not alone. Two friends who only know each other because our hearts hold the same pain and aching. Two friends, who want you to hear this: you are not alone. Your heartache, your pain, your hurt, yes, it is unique, but you are not alone. We want, more than anything for you to hear this: This sisterhood you’d never have chosen, that you’d give up any moment if you could, the one you’d turn the clock around on in a heartbeat given the chance, will not leave you alone. We will not leave you alone.
You are not alone.
But it gets better. You can heal. You can heal and have happiness again. And you can find the people that will be happy-sad with you. You can be happy and you can be sad. What we have learned is that the two are not mutually exclusive. We hold deep sadness daily, but we have become newly happy people again. Different happy. Knowing happy. Wise happy. But happy.
Today marks Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, on October 15th, and October as a month is set aside to bring awareness as well. 25% of pregnancies do not go full-term.
Your babies lives, however brief, made an impact. The people who know you, know a different you than who you might have been because of what you’ve been through. Those babies mattered and they made a mark on your heart and your life.
If you would like to add your baby to our Forever Loved Wall, please click below and use the form on our site. We will make every effort to get submissions listed to the wall within 24 hours. Your baby’s name will stay on our site indefinitely.