How Not to Lose Your Friends in Motherhood

How Not to Lose Your Friends in Motherhood | Twin Cities Moms Blog

If you’re like me, motherhood has been a joy, a blessing, it has brought so much to your life…but.

But it has also taken a few things too. Namely, friendships. I’ve watched some of my favorite friendships slip away quietly simply due to the natural season we are all in. We are moms – we’ve added to our families, which has added to our responsibilities and taken over our schedules. Time with each other has to be incredibly intentional, but often the energy left for planning friend time can get pushed to the bottom of the list.

Well, I decided to do something about it. 

This year, I made a commitment to bring people into our home more and I prioritized my mom friends within that commitment by starting a monthly coffee morning in my home once a month. It’s filled my heart, kept me connected, brought some of my friends that didn’t know each other before together in ways that are so fun. I couldn’t be happier with how it’s all turning out, but there is one very important rule to make sure this is something I can consistently do until, I hope, forever.

That rule is to keep it simple.

It’s too easy to fall into the trap that to have people over, your house has to be perfectly clean, you have to make something amazing for them to eat, and you have to entertain. This is just coffee. Plain and simple. 

I love to cook for people and I love to host. It would be so easy for me and, actually, so fun, to make this into something more. But the more “work” this is, the easier it would be for me to find an excuse not to keep doing it. Keep it simple, and it’s more likely to stick.

The week before each gathering I send a group text with a day and time. Then the morning of, after my kids are off to school, I remind myself that work can wait and put my computer away for 90 minutes, wipe off my table, make two pots of coffee, line up my coffee cups and open my door.  This simple gathering is doing so much for me and I hope it’s doing the same for my friends. I really think that as moms, we just need it to be easy and simple. And the beauty is in the simplicity. Give yourself permission to make it easy on yourself and then simply open your door.

Coffee + friends.
The end. 

Beth Zustiak
Beth is the Founder of and Director of Marketing for Twin Cities Mom Collective, the Co-Founder of Duluth Moms Blog and the Director of Business Development for City Mom Collective. She believes strongly in faith and friendships and the influence good people can have on your life. Having been through it, she has a heart for women who have experienced the loss of a baby and find solace in bringing awareness to loss and stillbirth issues. She is wife to Dan and Mommy to two gorgeous girls – Sophia {2009} and Evelyn {2011}, baby boy Wesley {2014 and four sweet babies in heaven. You can find Beth on Instagram. She loves leadership development, social media, hosting in her home and time with loved ones.


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