How Did She Do It?

As I’ve attempted to navigate the path of motherhood I have found myself questioning just how it is my mother did all she did for myself and my three older brothers with such composure and restraint.

Most every single day I feel like a chicken with my head cut off and somehow my mother kept it all together with four kids who span a wide age range – a 13 year difference between the oldest and the youngest. We were all very active in sports, playing many at a very competitive level both for our schools as well as for area teams.

How Did She Do It? | Twin Cities Moms Blog

While my mother didn’t have an official day job outside of the home she did work extremely hard at her own catering business for many years. Yet I don’t recall her ever missing a sporting event, somehow she was always there.

How Did She Do It? | Twin Cities Moms Blog

My father worked full time and my mother held up the fort.  I don’t know how she did it and I wish I did.  Did she get some kind of mothering guidebook I wasn’t given when we brought our babies home? Or, and I believe this to be more plausible, she was a true miracle worker.

I honestly don’t know if she cried and drank wine in the bath while we were off playing (probably fighting) with one another, or if she yelled into her pillow to voice the frustrations that surely she felt with the four of us.

I don’t have any memories of eating meals out of a box; we always had a homemade meal at dinnertime, even if it was eaten in the car from one practice to another. I am sure that my daughter believes I have no idea how to cook and that McDonald’s is our official family food source.

I also don’t recall my mother yelling at us much.  A trait I am almost certain I did not get from her, I am quick to lose my cool. While I work to control that I am also certain our 5-year-old thinks I have only two volume settings, normal and lose my mind.

How Did She Do It? | Twin Cities Moms Blog

{Photo Credit: Emily Lien Photography}

While I know we’re all trying to be the best moms we can be, I do feel the need to give a shout out to the moms, like my mom, who have it all together.  OR at least are better at faking it than I am.  

Born and raised in Johannesburg, South Africa, Debbie moved to St Paul, MN to attend the College of St Catherine a ‘few’ years ago. After graduation Debbie remained in the Twin Cities and pursued a CPA license and MBA degree. An accountant by day and (self-proclaimed) kick ass mom and wife ALL the time. Debbie now lives in Woodbury, MN with her amazing wife and almost 4 year old daughter. Hockey was Debbie’s first passion in life, until having her daughter 4 years ago, now she focuses on her daughter, her wife, her job, her blog and she still plays hockey as much as possible. Debbie and her wife are extremely passionate about equality for all and strive to share their two mom family with all, in an effort to educate others that families come in all forms. Debbie blogs over at Africa’s Blog ( and has a social presence on Facebook (, Twitter ( & Instagram (


  1. Well said young lady. It’s a much different world now. I feel like it’s so much more fast paced. With so much more to accomplish in a day. With most having 2 people working full time jobs. I know for ya we had to run a really tight ship for everything to run smoothly. You guys are doing just fine!


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