We have all heard the phrase, “It takes a village.” Those of us fortunate enough to live in a neighborhood filled with young children and families know the value of the relationships that form within our little village. Growing up in a neighborhood family is a true gift for our children and for ourselves. 
At the end of a long work day, I emerged from my home office in the basement and was greeted by the sound of kids playing together outside. I looked out our kitchen window to find that several neighborhood kids had joined my kids in the sand box. Ironically, most days the sand box only generates mild enthusiasm from my kids, but that day, with their neighbor friends joining them, it was the center attraction.
The group of young builders was bringing to life a village they had dreamed up together. They were hard at work, and it was fascinating to observe the group’s dynamics. The foreman was obvious, and he had established each kid’s role on the construction site. Some were digging roads, others were solidifying structures and the youngest – my toddler – was doing her own thing. The conversation was constantly flowing. There were discussions of plan modifications, demands for more sand, requests for tools and exclamations of disappointment when buildings imploded.
The sand box construction site was the focus of the neighborhood for a couple of days. Any free time was spent building up the village and creating stories for the fictional people who lived there. And just as quickly as the obsession with the construction site developed, it faded away. Before I knew it, the kids were on to their next neighborhood adventure.
The slower pace of summer gives the kids more opportunities to spend time together and there’s always some imaginative – and often elaborate – game they’ve concocted. I rarely fully understand the intricacies of their creative endeavors, but every kid in the neighborhood seems to be in on it. They do their best to align their schedules so they can continue their adventures. As they come and go from various summer activities, they shout to each other from their driveways making plans to meet at specific times – oblivious to whether or not the timing will actually work.
My kids naturally love being part of a close knit neighborhood with five families of playmates to entertain them. And my husband and I love it too and not just for the easy access to friends who can play at a moment’s notice. For us, the true value comes from the village our kids have found in this group. These friendships born out of convenience have taken root to form something deeper, teaching our children the value of a strong community.
For my extroverted son, this neighborhood clan is a dream come true. He has a sixth sense for knowing when others are outside and is always eager to join them. Each neighborhood relationship offers him something unique. He has his go-to friends who are always up for anything he suggests while others expand his horizons by introducing him to their interests. The older kids serve as role models who demonstrate the traits of a good friend and how to work through disagreements. And the younger kids give him opportunities to practice patience and empathy.
At two and a half, my daughter is the youngest member of the neighborhood clan. The kids love to dote on her as extended brothers and sisters and graciously tolerate her toddler bossiness and nonsensical chatter. She does her best to keep up with the big kids, running with them from yard to yard and playing her role in their imaginative play. As part of the group, she’s learning the age old lessons of sharing and compromise but also the incredible power of having a sense of belonging.
The community the kids have formed extends to the adults as well. As a neighborhood, we are a family of sorts who comes together to support, encourage and celebrate with each other. I see the power of this village as I watch our kids build relationships with the other neighborhood parents. My son is known for chatting up the neighbors and loves to ask about their days and share stories about his backyard adventures. My daughter basks in the attention she receives from these adults who take a genuine interest in her toddler stories and milestones.
Our neighborhood family brings out the best in our kids by teaching them the beautiful art of building and maintaining relationships. This community gives them a place where they can grow, make mistakes and discover who they are. While the days of neighborhood play in the sand box will come and go, the impact of these relationships will last for many years to come.
